Grounding techniques keep you in the present

Grounding techniques bring us into the present. These techniques are often based on mindfulness, which generally means being willing to accept painful and often unwanted thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations and being able to let them go while remaining in the here and now and listening to ourselves while doing so.

When we become dysregulated--ungrounded--it is usually because we have experienced a situation that triggered our fight-flight-freeze response. This response is the brain's natural way of protecting ourselves and is vital to survival. The problem is that your brain's top priority is to protect you. Well, we actually rely on the brain to protect ourselves. So, the real problem is that our brains process information incredibly quickly but can only rely on information from our past to predict our present safety. When we are triggered, it is the result of the brain scanning all of our memories and past experiences to predict the safety of our current situation. When the brain predicts the current situation as a threat to your existence, your brain tells you to flee from or fight the threat. If fight or flight will not work, you freeze.

In a freeze state, it can feel like we are out of our bodies, looking down at ourselves as if we are in a dream state or even floating away. So, in situations like these, we work to ground ourselves in the here and now. 

There are a lot of techniques one can use to ground themselves, and are entirely dependent on the intensity of one's dysregulation at any given moment.

If you are feeling highly dysregulated, consider trying the 5-4-3-2-1 technique. This technique encourages you to identify five things you can see, four things you can feel, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. It is a great technique for bringing you fully back into your body because you use all your senses.

Diaphragmatic breathing tends to be the technique that often supports the use of other techniques, so it is a fundamental grounding technique. There are a lot of names that this goes by, but the process of deep breathing is often similar to the many techniques you will find. Essentially, you breathe in for four counts, hold the breath in your chest for four counts, and then push the air out of your mouth from your diaphragm as if you are blowing out your birthday candles, but in a controlled way. Repeat this at least four times or until you feel a shift in your body, such as your shoulders relaxing or you yawn. 

Mindfulness walking is another way to ground yourself. To use this technique, walk slowly while paying close attention to the sensations in your feet as they touch the ground. Notice how your heel gently touches the floor, followed by the sole of your foot, and then notice how your toes grip the ground with each step. Do this until you notice you are fully regulated. 

There is no limit to mindfulness-based coping skills. Yet, working with a licensed mental health counselor to find the best skills for you is always an option. Several studies indicate that about 40% of a person's progress in therapy depends on the relationship with the therapist, so take time to find the right person for you. Many counselors offer a free 15-minute consultation, especially those who provide therapy online.